Tuesday, February 28, 2017

A rubber Story

This story occurred really in the morning while I was messaging my friend around seven in the mourning while we where at school, but we go different schools. I was erasing my work that I had written and then my eraser broke, and that is how the story began. Read the pictures for the story.

Sometime even the strongest relationship ends. This is because no one show the bad parts of their relationship, just like the glue used to hold these two ends of the eraser together. I never so it was going to break till it did. I never saw that the glue was not strong enough but it sure did look strong enough to hold the eraser together. Just like a relationship do not watch someone else relationship and think it prefect and say you want a relationship like theirs, because you never know what is happening behind close doors.
A little part of you will always love and care for the person but if it ended it ended for a reason. I told my friend the reason the eraser broke up is because the blue one was deployed back to the army and the blue line on the white was a symbol of they love and hope of his safe return.. Comment below your story you would give to the picture.

conversation about boys!!

Little do you know that I have written about every boy one this blog! I have turned them into a story well some! The stories are true but with a happier ending I guess. I was talking to my thirteen year old cousin about boys!!! Like I did not intent to but the conservation came up. So I told her a few my stories. Well the story that still is continuing till this day!!!

Let me give you a brief of the story.... They was this boy and when I met him... girlllll I crushed hard!! Like real hard but I did not say or acted on it... But eventually we became close and like real close and we talked for hours!!!! But my "kinda sorta" friend liked him also! so I never pursue anything plus I honestly did want to! long story short many many years have pasted and we are friends still.... And as annoying as he is.. *roll eyes* I truly care for him because he is my friend. So they got together and I am happy for them. I guess I am happy for them because when I look at him I do not see the boy I was crushing on any more!

I see him but I do not see the boy I had a crush one!! Which is really amazing! Or  am I just saying that because I have to feel that way. I am not sure. I am not sure because I do not think I feel anything again after my break up... which I do not think I ever expressed how much that hurt me... maybe next post.

So to the main point. My little cousin is going throw a friend stage with a boy and she really truly likes him and he knows.. He do not want to break they friendship. And she know see would want the relationship work out...

That is more complicated as I written as.. but I believe she has her head on right, and what I love about my cousins and I we give our all in relationships... which sadly can hurt us. I told her about the above situation and show her the guy.. LOL she was like okay I understand... lol

When life gives you a good guy hold on. Do put someone else happiness in front of yours. Be brave enough to go after what your heart desires.

But in life we go through so much turns that finding your soulmate feels like it would not happen. But when you do it would be all worth it. But I would wait and see till that day happens.

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Life and it's curve balls!!

So after a day like yesterday! I got sick! First time I ever got painful cramps!! Normally I never take anything for it!!! But last night I felt soooo much pain!! Its was like I know my heart misses him and then cramps. Still in pain but it is not as bad as last night leading into this morning!!

I really do not know what God has in store, but I will follow the way he plans it. Life is so confusing and everything and anything feels like it just going wrong! It feels like today is a day that all I want to cry and drop everything and lay in bed.

Hope this stream of whatever this misery is just needs to end soon!! Get be back to being focus on the important things in life!!! I really need this rocky road to show me why all this happened or is happening!!!

Anyone else is having a horrible day!! Well lets look for some light in this darkness!

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Our last hug!

Today was going perfectly fine!! It has been a few days without him in school. But due to the main situation I never wanted to contact him. So I told himself that he was not feeling well or something! I knew something was wrong! I do not why but I could just feel it!! Some type of connection I have with him that makes me know that something was not right!!

I told myself I was not going to contact him tell Wednesday!! But as the day went along. The place became different!! The place without him felt empty!! It is like I needed to see him or hear him to feel safe. Which is true because the only reason I am on that side is because I know he was there and wants he was, I knew nothing bad could ever happened to me! And If it did, God forbid, I know he was foots steps away!

Deep down in my heart I knew he needed me and something was wrong! I do not why or how I knew this but I could of felt it!! I just did not think it was my place to ask him that! But I really hoped he was perfectly fine! But I honestly missed him! The sound of his voice!! His annoying ways!! Everything I just missed him!!! I could passed him straight and never spoke to him, because I knew he was there and he would always be there!!

So I walked in to the place he used to always be!!! But my mind was on him.. my heart could not see him so my eyes and brain just wanted to leave!! Even though I was going to meet my other close friend!! Lucky they saw me as I walked in and walked right out back!! They came and got me!!  So I sat in that room where he once was!!! Thinking about how different the place was without him and all the annoying things he would harassing me about!! I missed him! I just needed to finally know what my heart think it knew!! That something was wrong!! I hoped nothing was!!

I asked his friend if they knew why he was not there!! They had no idea why he was not! That worried me!! So I know that I had to just contact him whenever I reach home!! I carried on watching my friend play pool! Then they asked me if I wanted to learn!! LOL me play pool!! Honestly only thing I was thinking was I wanted him to be the one who taught me! I got up and played pool for the first time!! I got all the (solids) balls in until the black 8 ball!! The main ball, the boy got it in before me! So he won! But I do not think I learned and thing but I know it would be the first and last time I played pool.

As I drove home! I got the feeling of you need to contact him!! Like honestly just do it! I stopped by grocery for my dad to get somethings! I sat in the car! I messaged him! I did not want to see his response till I reach home! So I took off my data! That's when it hit me! That I would never see him again like I used to!!! Then it got me thinking, the last time he hugged me, he held on longer than usual!! Did he know and did not tell me!!! Now I sat here and miss him!! Geez My friendship with you is one of the most important things in the world!!! I would always be there for you no matter the situation! We have always been there for each other!!!

God you know I need him!!! Please I cannot do this without his annoying, undecided, miserable self!!

Hold your close friendship tightly!! You never know when that daily hug or morning conversation would end!!! I am really going to miss you!!! You will always be my friend and I love you!!! You are the one person that gets me and the one person I could read like the back of  my hand!!

Remember me and remember us!!! Remember of friendship means more to me that you may ever realize!!! You have been there for me through my worst and still got my back!! Now it my time to be there for you!! Just let me, be there!!

Saturday, February 18, 2017

Valentine's Day

Where do I been!!! This day had so much unexpected events. Well firstly I wore a white short dress with red flowers and black flats. I went to school as normal and had class as normal. So my friends came over to where I was sitting doing my work. We are somewhat close but I did not see why they needed to stay as long as they did knowing our history! Just saying. So they are together. So you will think they would go be alone and exchange gifts or whatever the case maybe. Nopes. Lol But I was not to bored because I was finishing u some work.

So eventually the boy left, which of the two I am actually closest to. I did not know where he went. But she did. Because she sent him to buy her a valentine's gift. LOL she did not expect what he would actually do.. So while he was gone. She asked me what to get him!!! Well after all they got together a few weeks now, but she always say she knows him longer so she basically know him better.... but I am not going to say nothing. Yet you ask me what to get him for Valentine's on Valentine's day!!!

So he came back, but he had two cakes.. He gave me mines first... oooh since I was here blahhh.... I said you did not have to, but thanks. Mine you is the same cake he brought for his girlfriend.. Like boy the day she trip off on you eh!! I understand we are friends but he honestly should not of..

So finally I met my briendfriend and we walked to class together.. So after class this is where the interesting part occurred. Soo all I heard was, Excuse Excuse!!! So I turned around, he asked me if I doing Chemistry!! But I do not why I thought he meant as in a major .. so I said no!
But then I remember, maybe he was referring to the class we had after.. so I went back and asked him... This boy was like no I just asked because I wanted a reason to talk to you.. I was in shock and of all days to boy!! I know he asked me if I had a Valentine's,..... girl I said yes!! because i was still in sooo much shock!! lol I think asked for my snapchat, but I do not use it.. so I said I do not have one. Then I can not remember anything that was said.. All I know is after it happened, my friend and I walked away in shock!!!

I appreciate how much guts it maybe took him and how brave he was!! But we started to laugh because we sooooo did not except that to happen!! Do not worry he did not see us laugh. We bend the corner and then started to laugh.

So afterward we got food! Noodles and chicken with vegetables!! And we ate with chopsticks!!
Then we had class once more!! Soo during class my favourite friend right now! Messaged me that he was in m school!! So after class I went and hang out with him!!! Which was amazing because we does talk like we know each other for some years..

So after that really long conversation!! Which never really ends cause we text everyday!! Like we are really close!! So its good to have someone there that I know is always going to be there and keeps it real!!!!!

So after I went home and do work and studies because I had an exam the next day!

So my Valentine's day was not bad, but it was very interesting!!! How was yours????

Monday, February 13, 2017

I miss this!

I miss the days that I just came on here and wrote everything and anything!! I am so busy but I want to always put something out there for you all. To be honest after my grandmother died I just took a break from everything!!! I mean everything. God did send a really amazing friend my direction. You know when you barely know someone but you know they exist. The first conversation we had lasted nine hours!!!!!!!!!! Like what, that's so not me.

I have spoken to them ever since that day!!! So much that the person is the first person I talk to in the morning and the last person I talk to before I go to sleep!! I feels like we been friends for a life time and we recently just go back in touch.. I must say that person has become so important so fast. 

I think it is because I can be 100% real with them. No need to whole back or think about they reaction. Like we talked about everything I mean like marriage, jobs, retirement! Yes girl Retirement!!!!! LOL 

I am really thankful for a friend that because I know we have a true friendship! One that would be there till the world ends. So thank you Ad for being a really amazing friend!!! 

But enough of that!!!!! LOL Who are your friendships!! Because I have some other friendships that I really understand who or why God brought them in my life!! Like I understand that I was there for them when they need me and likewise when I needed them! But we are fine now soo why are we still friends or why is it that the person has not left!!! What do God have in store for that friendship. I really do not know!

Comment below your best friend name... better yet message them and tell them how happy you are to have some an amazing person in your life.. Also do me a favour if you ever have feelings for someone tell them, never assume they do not have the same feeling for you.. Just be brave and tell them no matter the situation.

Have an amazing day!!💙😗

Sunday, February 12, 2017

Pre- Valentine's day post!!💕

Yes! If you know me by now you would definitely know I love , love!!! Yes roses are red and candies are sweet like the comments you leave down below!!!! This valentine's would be my first valentine's by myself!!! Yes I am my own valentine's! But if you want I will be yours do not worry. 

I wanted to write this now and before the day comes so that I can write what happened on that lovely day!! So lets go back to the past valentine's!! So for the last two valentine's I was in a relationship. We exchanges gifts but we never went out!!! So technically I never had a real valentine's "date". Then the one before those I was single but one my closest friends was it that year!! LOL we still close but that friend is taken. 

So this valentine's is about me!! Loving life and loving that I can eat all the chocolate and not share with someone! LOL To be fully honest I have to study that night because I have a test the next day.

So my beautiful readers from all over the world!!!! Enjoy the day and be happy!! Do not wear all black and look depress! But if you do wear black make it sexy and be confident. Lift your head high and face this Valentine's day with a smile on your face. Tell me how you plan to spend your valentine's day and do not be afraid to comment please. 

Your comments truly make my day happier!!!💕

Serious conversation!

Have you ever known someone so well that you feel like you can read their mind! Or you are so close that you see their true emotions when they are hiding it behind a smile to pretend to everyone else!! Yes! we shared so much together! But why do I see his pain!! Why is it me that can see through is fake smile or even is fake laugh... 

 Sometimes all you can do is tell them that you know they are pretending!! But what do you do when they stay and try to stop pretending! Do wait and be there for them till it crashes and all the truth is reveal, Or do you just walk away and hope that they stop pretending and the smile their show to the world is genuine!! 

How do you know if to walk away? When there is so much history and friendship between you both! 
Girl what do you do! When you know your heart will always care for them but they made they decision! 

What would you do???